LIfe flies by....

I've been reflecting lately on how we (I) get so wrapped up in every day...how to get through the 5:45 wakeup through cleaning up the kitchen after dinner and everything in between... but then when one looks back at the days over the last weeks, months, years, there are very few that stand out as a remarkable day.  There are only moments, people, friendships, glances, feelings left.  It is strangely tragic - I don't know if that is the word - but it makes you want to grasp on to each one of those things for dear life when you stop and think about it. 

Last weekend kicked of summer in Chicago... Kate arrived on Friday for Damen's wedding, and we had dinner with Karen and her beau who were also in town, at the Cherry Circle Room, a historically restored place at the Chicago Athletic Association which was just lovely.  I woke up early the next morning and made us breakfast of French toast which I had been craving for weeks, then we drove to Kenosha for the wedding...it was...strange...the bride never said hi to us, the groom called Kate on the day of his wedding (they used to have some "relationship") and the day after, I felt it was missing that "passion" but who am I to judge.  Vainly, after our wedding which was so full of passion and crazy, most weddings frankly seem pretty dull!

After the wedding we went to the Brat Stop for local beers and cheese curds.  it was a hoot and we had girl talk until 3 in the morning.  Drove back home and got her to the airport.... went to work on the house with my amazing, dedicated sweet hubby ...Karen and George came by and checked it out and we went out for pizza.  It was really great.  Then on Monday we had friends over... a fun mix of our friends that happened to be in from Miami for the wedding, local new friends, and other friends from Baz's grad school.  Grilled up Wisconsin brats, drank rose, enjoyed the rooftop and just had a lovely day.

Tuesday came on strong... I can't even remember when or who but taught a few Pilates classes this week to prospect.  It gives me such joy to teach so I am really hoping I can parle it into a few steady clients per week for a) access to the studio and improving my own practice b)making some extra dough c) learning the business and d)helping other people feel happier and more comfortable in their own bodies which is the best!!

Mornings are crazy with getting down to Union Station by 6:30 or so, but it just flows right into the day and really doesn't seem to be too much, especially if I had a base f clients which is of course the hardest part.  Hubby has been getting up really early for work the past few weeks so it makes me feel less like a cray cray... it think 2 mornings max and 2-3 days after work or at lunch would be ok.  I hpe I can figure it out in time for Union to be cool with me staying on until I do!

Wednesday was exciting...I went up to Wisconsin for a photo shoot...acting as a food stager for a website for guys that design food packaging.  It was super random but fun and I made $250 and got out of the office lol.  Pretty low hourly when you count the drive time, but, whatever.  Hopefully I can get more...the owner of the studio wanted me for something in June but we will be out of town. 

So I feel like this week is just going to be so crazy...five days to prepare for being gone for two weeks... so much to do and leave in a position to be managed while I am gone.  I know everything will be fine...my para is so freaking good and amazing.  I am so blessed to have her not only as that but really more of a friend these days.  Struggling with how much to let her in on with the weirdness going on at work...don't want her to get stuck but feeling more and more like I've got Stockholm Syndrome with the whole thing.

Also, Uncle Dean was here Thursday  night!  We went for a lovely dinner at Green River...great patio overlooking the city with the most beautiful summer evening.  So great to see him...want to get past the surface but it's hard when we see each other every few months fr a couple hours.  I feel like he is a kindred spirit in that way.

This weekend was Pilates Friday and Saturday and some prep for the trip...trying to plan but not plan too much and just wing it.  Today will be working on the house all day with my hubs.  He really is amazing with this whole house thing.  It's like this whole new side of him and it is really sexy.  not that I didn't think he had it, but he is so dedicated and loving toward the whole thing, and so not lazy (like me!).  Feeling so super blessed with this man. 

Also went to the girl doctor who tells me everything is fine  bloodwork-wise and maybe I should go BACK on the pill to regulate.  I need to look for a new doctor... I just get this feeling that she is super rushed all the time and has these canned responses.  It's just such a pain to find someone new and then potentially start all over.  I'm over the hormones.  At the same time, I'm good with the status quo.

Like I said...life is flying and days are packed to the gills!

being in vegas is so wierd

I don't think I can have a normal Vegas experience...having lived here for four years (and LIVING every second of it) coming here as a tourist and especially as a work-tourist is crazy. 

Here for a real estate conference which has been fantastic... met this chick last week at our work happy hour who invited me to come with her and friends for a Sun-Tues stretch of Vegas networking...Boss man said go for it so I booked a 48 hour trip.  Things that have happened since I landed at 10 a.m. on Sunday:

• PG got me great room at Vdara.
• Cranked out SJB motion on plane.
• Met "John" at pool and basically just wanted someone to talk to so went for it and stupidly gave him my cell because I thought the girls I was hanging with would want to meet dudes.  So stupid and just dumb.  but whatever....free mimosa...wait...but then he continued to text me throughout the weekend and sent me a really creepy text about my "aura"
• Went to Bellagio to meet up with Katie and friends.  I am youngest of group but they remind me of me and my friends and are cool.  I think they are hungover, which is good, so none of us go too nuts.
• We go to a few work/networking parties and meet a lot of people that I need to follow up with.  Bond Bar and Clique at Cosmopolitan.
• Bed ....$35 quesadilla.
• Wake up
• Run
• Reserve spot at Vdara pool
• tan
• Go to lunch with D and P and F.
• Amazing
• Lago
• so good and real to be with my girl and catch up on our lives....just the best feeling in the world.  Like, catch me up on your life in 60 mins.
• Go back to Bellagio with pool with Katie and new bff N.
• Have drink to feel better and feel worse
• oh well...get in cold pool and deal
• Get ready for night two
• Meet up at Cosmo/Vaspar bar
• Veuve
• Walk into Beauty and Essex like a boss because of Flo's man.  Times your college tuition pays you back in very real ways....
• I wish I would have taken vegas more for what it was and what I had and ran with it.  Ohwell.
• Anyway...go to Marqueee...again, past all lines, for free, and drink tickets.
• party, drink, talk to people
• meet person who allegedly develops all trader joe's nationwide
• stay at club because you lived in vegas and have issues being anywhere except behind the private/velvet rope section
• walk through Cosmo and stop at craps table and meet person who owns grocery stores in Cincinnati.  Forget name.
• Feet hurt
• room...heat up quesadilla leftovers
• pass out

that's now...

xoxoxoxoxo.  what 48 hours ouch.

Reading May 2009 posts

Goodness... it has been seven years since law school graduation...I...just...can't.  That time in my life was so crazy and wonderful...I was just reading my posts about visiting with Cheprhan in the Hamptons, like a week before graduation.  Like, who does that?  Goes and stays with someone's mom...and his mom met a guy on Craigslist and he came to a bbq... i didn't remember that detail and I am so glad I wrote that post while I was there!  Incredible.

I don't know if I will look back on my early thirties with the same abplomb!  (Oh, we had the 9-5 grind and bought a house...whoopie!...as opposed to trailing around Costa Rica with my girlfriends and meeting men in bars and then traveling to see them at the house they live in with their mother)... but there is something so beautiful about our life right now and I remain sorry that I have not written more about the last seven years of our life together!  It is only memories.  Little references to my husband in our early dating years...long stretches of nothing except popping in to say "hi" and I'm happy.

Although we do still have an amazing life full of travel and little, daily adventures.  Just a good reminder of how precious every single moment is no matter where it happens.

These early morning weekend blog sessions get me so emotional!  Thank you lack of sleep.

I will add that even though I am not getting a period I totally feel these cyclical hormonal changes...like constant up and down but seems to be on some kind of cylcle.... a week or so of feeling totally bat shit crazy, angry, questioning everything, and then a week or whatever of total bliss and normalcy.  Insane.

the happy place

I'm so happy right now!  I don't know, I just have this peace and joy.  Yet I can't sleep with anxiousness (positive) and thoughts racing through my head of everything to be done!  Like I wake up so early and my mind just goes to the rabbit hole... Last night it was so bad I had to take a Mr. Z which I hate and then have counterproductive anxiety about taking anxiety medication...wtf?  But if I look inside I am so happy and thrilled with life right now!  It's so strange.  I think I just have so much on my mind that it is tough to calm down.  Between work which is going really well and I am truly thankful in this moment for the set up of independence that I have (setting all office political issues aside), Pilates, the house, trying to keep on top of food prep/eating healthy, getting my own workouts, being a good wife/daughter/friend etc... (and all not in THAT ORDER!).....it's a lot. But I wouldn't have it any other way because these are all such wonderful fun things.


I am really obsessed with my Pilates.... starting "officially" to teach tomorrow...it happened so much faster and, honestly, easier than I ever thought.  I mean, it's not easy by any means... now I have to find clients that are willing to pay real money to take private or group sessions!  Oh well, a new challenge.

Work on the house has been fun.  Baz has made incredible progress with the demo, and he is so happy to have the project and enjoys it, which is fun and great.  I love him, I don't know how I managed to get a guy like this...I guess I kissed A LOT of frogs first.  When I look back and think about the idiots that I could have/wanted to end up with (A), it is truly frightening.  Now I know why parents say they won't let their daughters date until they are 30!  Mine will be 40!

On that front, aunt flo still hasn't showed back up.  It is becoming a sort of undercurrent in my life and thank God I am so busy I don't have time to dwell on it.  And for some reason I feel this weird guilt thing when I think, you know what, now isn't a good time anyway. So maybe my bod knows that and is just going with the flow.  I know that's probably not a good scientific explanation, but again, I don't have time to worry about it.

My mom was here this week on her way to Pittsburgh; we had a fun 36 hours of showing her our new house, Pilates apparatus class, our traditional Belgian bakery, Macy's, Nordstrom, every other shop on Michigan, Eataly, and BYOB dinner at a Thai place.  It was really great to be with her; I've had my issues in the past and I feel like just taking a positive approach and realizing how precious little time we have in life has helped me a lot to get past my b.s. with mom issues.  However stuff still creeps up and I still want therapy LOL...that was another 2016 goal I haven't dealt with yet, le sigh.

Countdown to France has begun!  This time next week we will be on our way.  As usual, the work-stress involved in taking such time off is so challenging!  As opposed to Asia, I supposed I will be "reachable" so I am trying to strike the right balance of being around to deal with my clients and just enjoying life.

That's getting interesting; I want to make sure these guys stay "my" clients, but when a more senior person has the technical knowledge...sometimes I feel I am being "pushed out" on that front -- like it is easier for them to just do the work rather than have me do a draft and then have to correct it.  I hope we get another deal soon so I can put my foot down and say I AM GOING TO DO THIS ONE!

Ok, let's start this day with some hot yoga!

February 6, 2012

I just read a post from this date where I said I was thinking about getting my Pilates certification!  How funny that almost four years to the day was the first day of my training class!  I love it!

I am also a little heartbroken that I have less than half of a "year in review" post saved in my drafts for 2009.  It stops at April, which is right before I met my hubby, or actually the month that I met him the first time!  I talk about how I am going to come back to it, but I don't.  It is really interesting to read my state of mind that first few months of that year before graduating law school and embarking on "life"....so free, careless, yet apprehensive and wanting all those trappings of adult life at the same time... talking about being sad on New Years' and hoping against hope the next year would bring "good things"... obviously the man of my dreams is what I meant...and it did!  Amazing.  I am going to go check my old blog, maybe I finished off the post there but that wouldn't really make sense.

Good things come in threes?

I know they say bad things come in threes, but thankfully good things do too ...even in fours and fives!  :)

I have to say, Thursday was such a wonderful day.  It was our fourth wedding anniversary.  I was feeling stressed about an email I got from my Pilates teacher about how the program is going to work out, charging clients etc.  I went to a spin class and on my way out, the manager of that gym basically offered me a job teaching part time.  What could make me happier?  It was funny, because I had just reminded myself that morning to "go with the flow"...the right doors will open when they do.  Then, we got a new file from my new client -- a good one!  It was a great day.
then, yesterday, April 29, 2016 we closed on our new home!
It has been quite a week.  We spent last weekend in Sonoma with both of our sets of parents for the Dry Creek Valley Wine Festival and rented a lovely home on a vineyard.  It was a really great time....we had lots of laughs watching political comedy skits, eating and drinking together, playing celebrity, and even being hungover together haha.  It was a really fantastic weekend and we agreed it was even better for our parents than for us!  I think we were a bit nervous going into it with significant political and religious differences, but fortunately everyone hates the current political situation and the religion thing only came up one night late when everyone was drunk...and was quickly squashed.  My dad is so cute... my mom starts getting into and he's jus like....June, don't.  My mom is a little lush!  It's cute...she's like me, just likes to drink fast not to get drunk but because tastes good and next thing you know, wasted!
We are doing a major gut rehab of the house which is really exciting.  I think Baz is more excited than me, but it is fun to see him have a project and be excited about something.  It's going to be stressful, but I keep trying to tell myself that he has a nice, established record with our condo and I have to stay out of the way.
Fourth anniversary is fruit and flowers... Baz created this amazing fruit and flower box and stuck a gorgeous Shinola watch in there... watches hand made in Detroit with a cool shop in our neighborhood.  Very special.  I got him boxers and swim trunks with fruit on them - ridiculous - and flowered lingerie and a golf bag.  It's always fun to come up with the traditional gifts.

Work is so so.  The big boss is really starting to get on my nerves.  They owe me like $7K in expenses and unpaid 401K contributions.  It is starting to stress me out.  I want to get an exit strategy, but everything is going so well with my new big client that I feel I can't rock the boat right now.  I do feel a little trapped, but at the same time I am thankful for a legal job that allows me the freedom to teach Pilates on the side and do other things that I love with very little supervision.  It has been interesting working with a senior attorney on a client that is mine -- she has obviously WAY more technical knowledge than I, but the client is mine.  I need her 100% to do the work.  So, it's not like I can just take the client and go to another firm.  I would need to find another "her and team and it is next to impossible to know what you are walking into until you do it.  I am going to meet with an attorney friend this week and just get his perspective.  I don't want to, say, look a gift horse in the mouth, but I also don't want to sit back while my career rolls past me and I am blindly allowing my firm to steal from me...credit and otherwise.  But it all goes back to the firm having 100% supported the development of this client, paying for everything, giving me the time to tons of marketing with/for them, etc. etc.  So, I am not going anywhere, but i want to keep my eyes open as well.  In any case, hopefully I can make some decent side money teaching Pilates!  (And flipping houses LOL)!

Bliss

End of the first quarter of 2016!  Crazy... at lot has transpired and of course I become so bogged down (in a good way) with life that I forget to record it.

We are under contract on a two-flat and moving forward.  Should close in a few more weeks and then start a major construction project... the  numbers are scary but I trust my husband to manage it and we are really excited about the possibilities... having a rental/MIL unit or even doing Air BNB and seeing how the neighborhood (Avondale) is changing and growing yet still charming and ethnic and old.

Pilates -- i am OBSESSED.  I am absolutely so happy that I signed up for the class.  I met one really great gal in particular and friendly with others... it is so amazing to have access to studios all over the city to train friends and practice myself... I am surprised somewhat to find that I love teaching nearly as much as I love practicing so it has been really great.  i'm just going with the flow as to where it leads... they have not been totally clear about what will happen when the class is over, but I am hoping that maybe I can train in exchange for unlimited access to the studios, or whatever.  Everyone asks if I want to open my own studio... yes... maybe... I'm just going with the flow and will see what doors open and opportunities present themselves.  right now I am just really happy with it and enjoying learning and having a fun, productive, social yet personal hobby.

Work is good...we had a good quarter and things seem to be on an upswing with my bank client. Deals are trickling in and hopefully we will get more after a presentation we are doing this week.

I was asked to join the board of a networking group that I am in and am strongly considering it... just keep on keeping on...can't stop won't stop I guess!  life is really exciting right now with lots of fun things happening.  feeling extremely blessed and fulfilled.

In three weeks we go to Sonoma/Dry Creek Valley with both sets of parents for a wine festival which should just be incredible and entertaining.

My goal for next year, maybe 2018, will be to get real estate license.  I can't believe I never set true goals in my younger years...that practice has changed my life.

xoxoxoxoxo