i update once every, like, 3 months. I am so proud of myself for having kept up with this so well throughout law school and the end of college. It is fun/dramatizing/invigorating/depressing to look back at those years and the things that were going through my head. It is compelling to read about people who affected me so severely that are not even part of my life any more. It's insane the things that mattered. It is fulfilling to look at goals that have been achieved and dreams that have literally come true. Amazing to learn how perspectives change and how one day to the next is always truly an adventure.
I, as I usually do, read through the "May" entries to see what i was doing this time a year, two years, three, and now four, years ago. CRAZY!!!! College graduation, the time right before Europe, the time right before I started my job (internship) and time right around law school graduation and beginning of bar study.
Now here I am, a full-fledged lawyer. pretty wild ride it has been. but beautiful. by way of update, i am still in a full-fledged (healthy -- yay!) relationship with the love of my life. I love him more every day and am so thankful that there are still people like him left in the world. so many of my issues with men and trust and on an on are just put to rest like i never even rememnered i had them. reading all that old nonsense makes me realize how fortunate I am to have someone like him, but also how much I have learned and experienced.
My life outside of him basically consists of working. I truly love my job -- i mean, working BLOWS in terms of working for the man and giving someone else my time -- but i am extremely fortunate to be in a good spot and be respected and appreciated enough to not completely dread getting up in the morning.
my personal life, i.e. friends is minimal. something that i know i need to work on. I've compeltely become the girl with the boyfriend that just kind of blocks everyone out. Its not really intentional, but its like my free time is so limited now, i want to be with him or i want to be alone. i do feel like it is a bit unhealthy but at the same time why should i force myself into friendships that i just honestly don't want to make time for. I do the occasional happy hour and lunches and stuff like that but i do need a good girl - friend to gab with guy stuff and makeup and that kind of thing. but i guess i will just keep trusting that person will show up. in the mean time i am happy figuring it out.
my relationship with my roommate has deteriorated majorly. if i am honest with myself i know that it is because deep down i just don't really like her and we don't see eye to eye on many things...i have always felt a little "off" about our relationship but she is a good roommate so i have always made it work. But we've basically decided that our relationship is beyond the point of repair -- she blames me for having the BF over too much, and i blame her for not accepting my transition into a relationship. She claims i am a completely different person than i was a year ago, and yes, i am. things have 100% changed, you know? anyway, it is such a negative thing to not speak with the person that you live with so i am just taking it day by day for the next couple of months.
my parents are doing well -- i miss them terribly. it is so hard to picture where life will go in the next five years or so. while i can never imagine moving back home, i think now that at least moving back to the state is not totally out of the question, at least temporarily. but i can't imagine going without my honey, and he has his sights set on Seattle, so we may have to meet somewhere in the middle. we shall see.
c'est la vie!
15 hours ago
